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By visiting this site, you read at your own risk. I am known for errors in grammar and spelling. If you become less intelligent by reading this site, become incredibly bored, or are disgusted by what you read - you were warned. Furthermore, I will not be held responsible for ANY mental, emotional, physical, financial, or spiritual damage to you, your friends, your family or strangers. I apologize to my friends and family if I embarrass you. I reserve the right to edit any and all comments on this blog. I also reserve the right to humiliate you if you dare say anything negative about me, my friends, my family, or strangers who I like.
Sunday, October 28, 2007RED SOX Win World Series
I love watching the Red Sox!
I especially love watching them win the World Series!
7th in franchise history!
I'm so happy and giggly... and in a hotel room with no one to share in my excitement. I was on the phone with Blair when Jonathan Papelbon pitched the final strike to end the game. He had a t.v. delay on his end (by a few seconds) so I started screaming and jumping up and down before he had a chance to see what happened (oops). I love everything about Boston and it's moments like these that make me MISS IT soooo much!
Congrats to the Red Sox and my friends in the
Red Sox Nation!!
Friday, October 26, 2007A Lonely Night
I'm missing home, a lot, tonight. I am working in Arizona until Tuesday but that might as well be centuries away from today. I've tried to keep myself busy, but when you get lonely - you're just lonely.
I went to a movie. When it was over, I looked to my side where Blair (or anyone!) should have been sitting. Instead, I saw an empty seat. I felt even lonier.
I drove back to my hotel - trying to think of what I would do next. -I know myself; when I get like this, I get depressed. I thought of fun songs that I could play and dance around my hotel room - even jump on the bed if I want! But, when I got here, I didn't.
Instead, I called Mom & Dad. They always know what to say - even if it's nothing. Talking to Mom & Dad makes me feel close to home... Getting off the phone is when I feel miles away.
I called Blair. We talked for nearly 30 minutes - a record phone conversation since I've been back from Harvard. He was the absolute best part of my day...
And now, I'm alone with my thoughts again.
I've got a busy day tomorrow. I'm going to see a friend of a friend who promises to be a good time. She's a fun girl who I've met a couple of times - someone who I really like. That should be good; I need someone fun and cheery.
It's a full moon and the Depression Werewolf within me is raging...
Thursday, October 25, 2007Close Call
Today I sat at an intersection in Tucson, AZ, waiting for the light to turn green. As I sat, a green car whizzed past me into the middle of the intersection, just in time to get hit by a truck turning left. I watched with amazement at the sight that unfolded before me. Everything seemed to happen in slow-motion. The sound of the metal; the explosion of glass that erupted into the street; the feel of my heart thumping in my chest... OH MY GOD!
And then, it was over. The green car pulled over to the right and the truck cleared the intersection. Stopped cars around me started to pull forward. I made a right turn, to ask the driver of the truck if he was okay... Shaken, he was okay (he was just a kid!). He was already on the phone with him mom who was calling the police. I hooked a u-turn and pulled over the green car. A young(er) girl was standing outside, surveying the damage. She looked upset. I asked if she was okay... She was; although pissed. "I thought I could clear the red light. But I guess I didn't." I tried to think of the right words to say. I couldn't. Instead, I asked if she had a cell phone to call someone. Then I asked if she had insurance. ...I think it was at this time I realized I was being an ass and a nuisance. I should just leave and let them figure it out...
Part of me wanted to be a good Samaritan today. Maybe part of me wanted to reach back in time and help my parents that fateful January day... But, being a helpful person was not in the cards.
Seems like destruction is following me: first the fires and now this car accident. This is a reminder to SLOW DOWN and be CAREFUL. You just never know what's coming around the next turn. Take time to tell people you love them; make sure you have insurance; enjoy the scenery a little more; don't rush Life too much.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007Fire
It's always good to come home. However, the last couple of days that I was home were tense. Unless you live under a rock, the nation is watching the fires in Southern California. For up to date information, please click HERE.
As of this morning, I am back on the road again. From the airplane window, I got a different perspective of the fires... I thought I would share a picture from the smokey skies over So Cal.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007Who, ME?
Tuesday, October 16, 2007Why I Miss HOME
So, Blair is on the phone with me when he gets home tonight. I hear him walk through the door (and we're both expecting for Bailey to come bounding toward him as she usually does) and then, SILENCE. Where's Bailey? Every now and then, she'll lock herself in the bedroom. But we now put a towel over the door so that the door never fully shuts. Blair walks to the bedroom. SILENCE. She's not there.
He tells me that he'll call me back. Uh.... okay... WHERE'S THE DOG???
Blair finally found her. She was in the closet. -Apparently, she is ALL GIRL:
Yep, that's my expensive Italian purse on her head. Blair found her like this and took a couple of pics before becoming her personal hero. Somehow, she managed to get into my purse and then couldn't figure out a way to get it off her head! She locked herself in the closet and stayed there for the better part of the day (we think). She hadn't eaten much of her food, was really thirsty when she was "saved" and Blair had no messes to clean up outside. Poor thing was in the dark for hours. Dazed and confused, Bailey was freed from her leather head-cage. Amazingly, she was still curious about the purse afterwards. Ah, that's my girl... she has good EXPENSIVE taste... Bailey, Bailey, Bailey - I miss you sooo much while I'm traveling for work!!
Technology is supposed to let us be better communicators. -You know, to get our "messages" sent and received faster and more efficiently. But I see the opposite happening. We are more isolated than ever. Today, I saw four young people walking together. Strangely, though, all of them were talking on cell phones. How can four people be "together" when none of them were willing to put down the cell phone and actually try a stimulating conversation with the people to their left and right? We've lost our ability to connect with those around us - seemingly wanting to "talk" to the next best thing.
I've known adults to do this, too. Blair is pretty bad... We'll be together with friends at dinner and he'll pull out his cell phone to check the score of a game or to send a text message to someone. It drives me nuts. I feel like I have to apologize for him - "I'm sorry, we really like being with you - but my boyfriend just has to know the score of the game at this exact moment. No, no, he's not bored by you at all." If someone did that to me, I would say something. But that's me.
Internet cafes are the worst. By definition, cafes are meant to bring people together, yet, everyone is in their own space - communicating not by voice but by an invisible Internet. How do we truly connect to one another when we have lost our voice? We are rapidly losing our ability to have human connection of any value and meaning. The more we try to connect, it seems, the more we feel lost and alone.
Don't get me wrong, I love technology; but I hate what it has done to people...
Friday, October 12, 2007Breathe. Just Breathe.
Joe is going to be a father.
For those who don't remember, Joe was my first boyfriend. He was my first love, the first guy I got totally giddy about. Remember those high school days when we were full of reckless abandonment; didn't give a f*ck about anything other than ourselves; got the first taste of LIFE; and found that one person who was IT? That was him. He was my ... well, he was my everything - and for that, I'll always be fond of him and our friendship. He got married a few years ago (when he really shouldn't have). He's totally unhappy in his marriage (even split up from his bitch-of-a-wife in April) and now they're having a baby.
And, at first, I was speechless.
I just sat in my car, with the rain pouring down all around me, and heard the news. I felt my face get flush and my eyes started brimming with tears. He kept talking and all I could think about was - HE'S HAVING A BABY. He kept talking - saying that he's thrown himself into work and he's bought a few baby books and he's going to New York this weekend and... HE'S HAVING A BABY.
Being the suave person I am, I asked all the wrong questions and probably said something I shouldn't have. "Do you think she did this on purpose?" (He doesn't know.) "Are you happy about becoming a dad?" (There are some days when he's happy about it.) "Do you have any names picked out?" (Riley if it's a girl and Connor if it's a boy.) And, at one point, when I tried to gather myself, I said "Congratulations; I know you're going to be a great dad." And I meant it.
I don't know why I'm so upset about it. Maybe because I want him to be happy (and I hate knowing that he's not). Maybe because I think this is a terrible situation. Maybe because I believe that having a baby under these circumstances is just plain unfair for that kid. Maybe because I hate myself for hoping that this isn't really happening. Maybe because a long time ago, Joe and I had picked out our kids names: Kaylin and Matthew.
I keep reminding myself to breathe. Just breathe. Things will work out for them; Joe is one of the luckiest people on Earth. -And while I still care for him, this doesn't concern me. It's his life - his choices.
Monday, October 01, 2007Who Needs A Leaf Blower When You Have A Vacuum?
When I'm in town, I walk Bailey every morning. Usually, we are both still bleary eyed and half-awake when we walk out the door. However, Bailey has an uncanny way of quickly making every outing an adventure. As all puppies are wont to do, she is curious about her surroundings and things she finds on the ground. So curious, it seems that she needs to pick everything up in her mouth for a few steps before moving on to the next. Leaves, cigarette butts, pieces of paper, baby socks - you name it, she'll pick it up. I've realized that the only way to stop this behavior is to keep her moving. ...Which means, I have to keep moving... FAST.
My friends used to say that I have a tendency to walk fast; probably because my short legs constantly had to keep up with everyone around me! But at 6:00am (or earlier), I'm not exactly in the fast-paced walking mode. That is, until now. I try to remind myself that this is GOOD for me, especially GOOD for Bailey. We both need decent exercise. But, holy crap, it's kicking my ass!
The joys of being a pet owner continue.