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Most Normal Girl |
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Yahoo .: Credits :. Template By Caz Powered by: Blogger .: Disclaimer :. By visiting this site, you read at your own risk. I am known for errors in grammar and spelling. If you become less intelligent by reading this site, become incredibly bored, or are disgusted by what you read - you were warned. Furthermore, I will not be held responsible for ANY mental, emotional, physical, financial, or spiritual damage to you, your friends, your family or strangers. I apologize to my friends and family if I embarrass you. I reserve the right to edit any and all comments on this blog. I also reserve the right to humiliate you if you dare say anything negative about me, my friends, my family, or strangers who I like. |
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Wednesday, October 04, 2006Don't Step On The Cracks Or You'll Fall And Break Your Back!Remember that saying, "Don't step on the cracks, or you'll fall and break your back?" It was one of those elementary school-yard sayings that people would chant while playing on the broken cement. (That's how we played, before you rotten kids got soft. Not to mention the fact that we walked to school - in the snow, uphill, both ways!) I finally realized what that saying meant as I trudged through the streets of New York, recently. The thing about New York streets is that they are shit. It smells of urine (and the dog mess on the sidewalks will attest to that last statement). Moreover, the cracks in the sidewalks will eat you whole, if you're not looking. You have to understand that everyone is dressed to the nines and WALKS everywhere in "the city" - which is not so cool to a CA girl who loves her car. Parking is a bit of a hassle; if you're lucky enough to find a spot, you still have to walk 18 blocks to get to where you need to go. Dressing to the nines, as I mentioned, is a must. Business attire, of course. When you're a woman, this means wearing three inch heels to accompany the outfit. I was no exception. I looked great. But, as I discovered the hard way, you really have to watch where you step. Each crack will literally grab the heel of your shoe, if you're not watching. Seriously, it's as if giant crack monsters pop out to grab onto you, unexpectedly. You can't recover gracefully from that type of encounter! And oh... I tried to be graceful. As I walked, all I could hear in my head was that elementary school chant. I did not want to break my back (or my neck, or my leg, or my arm, or my butt, or any part of my body) so I was careful to avoid the cracks. I don't know how the girls of Sex & The City did it - maybe it's a New York thing.
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