Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Regret

One of my most favorite blogs to read (besides my own, of course) is Dooce. I love Heather's writing and I have come to regard her as an inspiration for the writer within me to let loose. Today's entry was a birthday blog celebration - which was nice and funny and all that... But what really got me was the people who wrote a response.

The topic was regret. And boy... was it something. Dooce said that she wished she had worn more sunscreen. (Good one.) At first I thought, oh I'll add some funny quip about farting in public or something stupid like that, but the more I read the more serious it got. Sure, there are some anecdotal responses, but there are some very poignant ones too. Here's a sampling of what is already up:

* I wish that I had not worked quite so hard in college and allowed myself to have a little bit of fun. If only I'd known the words "cum laude" would be so small on my diploma, and that the only person who would care was me. That could have saved me so much sleep.
* I regret screwing over most of the people that I have screwed over; I regret bitching until my mom agreed not to chaperone our high school trip to Germany - I robbed her of a fantastic opportunity; I regret not spending more time with my dad before he died. He loved me so much & didn't know how to show it. I loved him, too, and didn't realize just how much I would miss him after he was gone.
* I wish I'd stood up for myself more.
* I wish I had never picked up that first cigarette.
* I wish I had never used a credit card, run up all that debt, and started a 401K at 21.
* I'd have found my real voice as a much younger woman and used it to take a stand for myself instead of living to please others.
* I would have given myself a break sometimes. I'm never going to be perfect.
* I would have kept my daughter.
* I wish I had known I would get cancer at 24--I wouldn't have worked so hard in college.
* I wouldn't have gotten married so young (21). Maybe then it wouldn't have taken until my 30s to figure out who I am and what I want to do with my life.

It's amazing to me how similar all the entries started to become. We all seem to have been suffering from insecurity, debt, missed opportunity, wreckless choices, not enough "good times," and failed relationships. Maybe some of us still do.

When I sit and think about the regrets I have in my own life, there are few that I can't begin to change. I need to take better care of my health. I need to say I LOVE YOU more often to friends and family. I need to not worry about my debt so much. I need to work less and take more breaks. I need to not take myself so seriously. ...AND I CAN.

So, for now, I won't share any of my regrets. Instead, I'll just say that I hope to have few more.

But, please, if you have some regret that you want to get off your chest - the rest of us would love to hear them...
Posted by Jessie_b :: 1:20 PM :: 0 comments

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